Welcome To My Universe
lunes, 23 de julio de 2007
I wish i could escape
What's new with you? I haven't heard from you lately
That always make me go mad and sad
Why?? you tell me
You've got something
i don't know what it is
It's something special that i can't describe
Something that makes me love you that much
If you knew how many nights i've cried for you
But don't wanna tell you
why?
because i'm afraid
because i think you don't feel the same
and also because i don't want to act like a victim
a poor girl that goes around the city crying and shouting
nobody loves me
because it isn't that way i can't say that even if i feel that way
I can be sourrounded by people that really love me and that are nice with me
but the only person that can make me feel happy and alright
is you
You have the power for that
But you don't know or at least that's what i think
You might be the one for me but i'm just dreaming
Why dream?
What's the point of it...
Everytime i dream with something like this
it never really comes true
It's always suffer
and i'm sick of it
why did i had to be so sensible
why do i cry that much for you
Nobody understand how i feel
Because i don't tell them anyway
but it's because if i tell them they think i'm crazy
that i'm talking shit because i'm "surrounded by love"
I have "everything"
and that there are people with more serious problems
so what?
I feel this and i can't avoid it
Even my best friend doesn't care when i start with this
Maybe everyone thinks i'm too dramatic
That might be true
But tell me what can i do?
Why do i always fall in love that hard and with people that don't love me the way i want them to love me
I can't force it
I can't
That's why i never say a word
Even if i'm dying because of it
I wish i could go to sleep one night and sleep forever, never wake up
But when you appear
I forget about that and i just want to be with you or talk to you
I know i don't know you too long and that I haven't love you for too many time
but it's going to be a year soon
And i must say that like i've said before in this blog
I hated you before but i think i was in love with you
I never hated you
I was just jealous
Because i couldn't be your friend
because i couldn't be with you
the way i wanted
but then i met you and it was like
whoaaaaaa
and then like two day later i realized that i was in love with you...
Okay i will finish now
It makes me bad
I wish you could invite me to go out sometime
or call me or send me some messages sometimes
because those details make my day.
ok that's all
---------------------------------------------
***I wish i could escape from this pain
spread my wings and fly
leave the pain behind
isolate my feelings
and memories
and then die***
sábado, 21 de julio de 2007
Sweet 16!! xD
So yesterday was my b-day finally and now i can say i'm officially 16 years old!!! lol
Anyway yesterday was a really happy birthday for me i had a lot of fun even my best friend wasn't in town and i miss her i had a great b-day...lol
I woke up early in the morning because even if i tried i couldn't sleep well...
Then i received a present from Cristina, the housekeeper.
Then in the afternoon i went to the cinema with jose and we saw ratatouille
I must say my expectations from that movie wasn't the best ones i thought it was going to be a little boring but i was wrong it was a good movie, not the best one i've seen but i liked the history of that little mouse that wanted to be a chef.
The best thing was that i was able to go for free with him.
Thats awesome something good that comes out from that credit card. lol
just joking.
After that i came back home and there were my cousins with their parents and my grandmother.
I had a really good time with my cousins too we had a lot of fun with my cousin watching some funny videos on youtube.
and talking about some stuff.
Anyway it was a really good b-day
one i will never forget. I must say i liked this b-day more than last years b-day
I hope that next year its as good at this one or even better !!!
=)
i want to thank everyone who remembered my b-day and for their good wishes and also the people that share with me that day. =)
-Nicole
Anyway yesterday was a really happy birthday for me i had a lot of fun even my best friend wasn't in town and i miss her i had a great b-day...lol
I woke up early in the morning because even if i tried i couldn't sleep well...
Then i received a present from Cristina, the housekeeper.
Then in the afternoon i went to the cinema with jose and we saw ratatouille
I must say my expectations from that movie wasn't the best ones i thought it was going to be a little boring but i was wrong it was a good movie, not the best one i've seen but i liked the history of that little mouse that wanted to be a chef.
The best thing was that i was able to go for free with him.
Thats awesome something good that comes out from that credit card. lol
just joking.
After that i came back home and there were my cousins with their parents and my grandmother.
I had a really good time with my cousins too we had a lot of fun with my cousin watching some funny videos on youtube.
and talking about some stuff.
Anyway it was a really good b-day
one i will never forget. I must say i liked this b-day more than last years b-day
I hope that next year its as good at this one or even better !!!
=)
i want to thank everyone who remembered my b-day and for their good wishes and also the people that share with me that day. =)
-Nicole
Ps: today's picture is from myself taken with my new camera :D
lunes, 16 de julio de 2007
I want my dream to become my reality
I'm leaving a dream everyday
a dream that i want to be true
but i can't make it yet.
I now i should live my reality
and i kinda do, but it's getting too hard for me
i can't do it anymore
I need you !! for christ sake
when would be the day that at least one dream could became true in my life.
You came to my life you appeared in my way
when before that i hated you i though you were mean but at the same time i though you were the nicest person in the world... how could this be possible ?? i have no idea
I always said how much i hated you to everyone...almost....
everyone looked at me with a strange way
but anyway i hated you but
then i met you and you were how i thought the nicest person in the whole world
and i fell in love with you i couldn't evite and right now i'm crying because of that because i remember every second i spend with you (they weren't so many) and it was like heaven
and i wish you could feel the same for me even i don't know what you feel and i wish i could know
but i can't just ask you...you have to tell me but i think you don't feel the same as i do.
and that's killing me right now
I write this because i'm not telling this to anybody i keep this on my own...
I know i should tell someone and let the pain out
but it's hard for me to tell someone what's happening to me what my feelings are.
i'm very shy and such an introvert but with you i'm an extrovert...almost at least
how could this be possible and that we are so similar... i mean we have similar tastes...
or me is something that i can't believe i thought i will never meet you or talk to you...
I thought i will have hated you for ever but it was because i was jelous i was jelous of everyone who was your friend because i knew they had the best friend you could have.
Even though i don't know you that much to say this i think you are the nicest person...
someone who really listen to you and is there to support you...that doesn't lie to you...i don't know i might be wrong but i don't think so.
you are so kind too
i think i better stop now. it's too much and it's hurting me because i go back to the past and wish i could be with you again....
the tittle of today's picture is endlessly waiting... it's a drawing i made for school but i loved it and i think it represents what i'm feeling right now... I'm endlessly waiting for you to come for me and made by dream come true, become my reality...sábado, 14 de julio de 2007
Meaning of liFe
Can you tell me what's the meaning of life?maybe yeah the dear friends and the family
but what do you do when that isn't enough
the love sometimes is the responsable for that
why? why do we have to meet people and fell in love with them
and then we can't be with them
I want your friendship at least
The steps we are following are too slow
Can you move faster??
I'm sick of waiting... for something special to happen
cause it never happens
I might can have everything you need to survive and most people can say that i shouldn't be this
way but can i have the control of my feelings??
no... I wish i have but i don't
my feelings are and have been always stronger than me.
I can not control them
When something hurts me i can't avoid it.
Do you understand what i'm saying?
are you reading it?
Do you know how i feel or should i forget you?
I don't want to my heart doesn't
Can you tell me what's on your mind?
So many questions without answer are driving me crazy.
Will you ever take my life?
Do it now before it's too late and i'm gone forever
this is all for now
hope you get the message, even i think you will never read it...
Desperated, Desolated,i wanna leave this place and go to that place were i'll always be save
martes, 3 de julio de 2007
Time To Play
My concert is coming and i'm excited about it!!
It's tomorrow!! i can't wait more!! I have a solo and that keeps me even more excited!! lol
what else? umm i'm finally ending the school semester and that makes me really happy.
I wanna holidays so bad right now!! I'm tired of waking up so early in the morning and with the typical winter coldness it's even worse.Also my b-day its coming on july 20th
i'm becoming 16!! but i'm not going to make any sweet 16 kinda party lol i can't aford someting like that and i'm not interested either.
I have been working on a new layout for my AFI website and it's finally done but i have to add it to the other sections yet. But it has new stuff. I'm happy about the result.
Yesterday i went to some stores with my parents to see the price of the digital camera that i want. It's a sony Cybershot and i'm in love with it!!
And it seems that i'm going to become it for my b-day!! yay!!
I'm so happy about it i can't wait to have one and take pictures of everything !! lol
Okay so i don't have anything more to tell. All I can say is that i'm happy for a secret reason!! lol
but i'm happy and that's great i was a little sad the past weeks but since last week i've been really happy. Someone has made my day. my everyday. and i'm happy. lol i know i'm repeating it a lot. so i will just end this here.
Today's picture is stolen from deviantart. I saw this picture and i absouletly fell in love with it. I love it and i love the violin too so maybe thats one of the reasons why i love it so much. Idk how to explain the feeling but i can say i love it. hahahaha
okay enough
-Nicole
